Let’s be real for a sec. Have you ever felt like your friends are slowly pulling away? Like, you text, and they leave you on read? Or suddenly, group plans are happening…without you? Ouch. Before you start drafting a dramatic “I’m better off alone anyway” text (don’t do it), let’s talk about what might be going wrong.
Friendship is a two-way street, bestie, and sometimes we are the ones making things awkward. But don’t freak out, this is fixable! Let’s get into the seven sneaky things you might be doing that are lowkey pushing your friends away, and how to fix them.
1. You’re Always Talking, Never Listening
Okay, we get it, you have a lot to say. But if every convo is just you ranting about your problems, your latest crush, or that one time you almost went viral on TikTok, your friends might be feeling like unpaid therapists. Friendship is about listening too.
Fix it: Next time you’re with your friends, challenge yourself to ask them about their lives. And actually listen to the answer, without waiting for your turn to talk.
2. You Ghost When You’re in a Relationship
So, you got a new boo and suddenly forgot your friends exist? Oof. We’ve all seen it, someone gets into a relationship and suddenly their entire social life revolves around their S.O. until, shocker, the breakup happens, and they come crawling back.
Fix it: Your friends existed before your relationship, and they’ll be there after. Make time for them. Period.
3. You’re Always Complaining
If your entire personality is “life is the worst,” your friends might start avoiding you just to protect their own mental health. No one is saying you have to be fake-positive, but constant negativity is exhausting.
Fix it: Try balancing your rants with some good vibes. Share something fun or exciting instead of just the bad.
4. You’re Always One-Upping People
Friend: “I failed my math test.” You: “That’s nothing! I failed two tests, spilled coffee on my shirt, and got called on in class when I wasn’t paying attention.”
Sis. No. This is not a competition. Constantly trying to outdo your friends’ experiences makes them feel unheard and unimportant.
Fix it: Validate their feelings instead of trying to make the conversation about you. A simple “ugh, that sucks, do you wanna talk about it?” goes a long way.
5. You’re a Flake
Are you the friend who always says they’ll come but never does? The “I swear I’ll be there” friend who somehow never shows up? People notice when you constantly bail, and eventually, they just stop inviting you.
Fix it: Be honest about your plans. If you know you’re not going, don’t commit in the first place. And if you do say yes, follow through.
6. You Overshare (Like, Way Too Much)
TMI is real, my dude. Your friends don’t need a play-by-play of your entire life, especially not the super personal, awkward, or just plain weird stuff.
Fix it: Read the room. If people start looking uncomfortable, maybe dial it back a bit.
7. You Never Apologize
We all mess up. But if you’re the kind of person who refuses to admit when they’re wrong, that’s a problem. No one likes a “sorry you feel that way” fake apology. Own your mistakes and make things right.
Fix it: A simple “Hey, I messed up. I’m really sorry” can save a friendship. Be genuine.
The Bottom Line
Friendships take effort. If your social life is feeling off, take a step back and check if you might be doing any of these things. The good news? It’s never too late to change.
Which of these are you guilty of? Spill in the comments, no judgment here!