Rule , 1: The 24-Hour Cry Rule (But No More!)
Listen, you get one day to ugly cry, blast sad songs, and question every life choice. After that? It’s time to put down the ice cream spoon and reclaim your power. Why? Because no guy (or girl) is worth ruining your mascara for more than 24 hours.
Rule , 2: Block, Mute, Delete – No Exceptions
Do not, I repeat, do not stalk their social media. Seeing them “live their best life” (which is probably fake, by the way) will only mess with your head. Hit that block button like you’re swiping on a red flag.
Rule , 3: The “Do Not Text” Pact
No, you do not need to send one last message for closure. You already have closure: they are not in your life anymore. Screenshot that draft text, send it to your bestie instead, and let them roast you into deleting it.
Rule , 4: Romanticize Your Life Now
You were the main character before they showed up, and you still are now. So start acting like it. Buy yourself flowers, take hot selfies, wear that outfit you love. No one’s stopping you from being your best self now!
Rule , 5: Avoid the “Breakup Haircut” (Unless It’s What You Really Want)
Yes, impulse bangs can be a cry for help. If you truly want a hair transformation, go for it—but do it for you, not because you’re spiraling. We love a glow-up, not a regret-up.
Rule , 6: Make a Breakup Playlist (But Not a Sad One)
No more tear-jerkers. Build a playlist of absolute bangers that make you feel like a goddess who has better things to do than cry over someone who didn’t appreciate her.
Rule , 7: Find a New Obsession (Preferably Not a Person)
Become that girl. Start a new hobby, hit the gym, learn a skill, binge an insane TV show. If your brain is busy, it won’t have time to reminisce about that walking red flag.
Rule , 8: Create a “Breakup Bucket List”
Write down 10 things you always wanted to do but never did while you were with them. Whether it’s traveling, trying a new fashion style, or going out solo, do it all and reclaim your independence.
Rule , 9: Remember Why It Ended (No Selective Memory!)
Your brain is going to try and romanticize the relationship, only remembering the good times. Don’t let it! Keep a list of reasons why it didn’t work. Read it every time nostalgia tries to trick you.
Rule , 10: Date Yourself First
Before you even think about rebounding, take yourself on cute dates. Fall in love with your own company. Because the best way to move on? Be so in love with your life that you don’t need anyone else to complete it.
What’s your go-to breakup survival tip? Drop it in the comments! Let’s build the ultimate heartbreak survival guide together.